No Can Do: Empowering Women

Enter relationships with trust then test to see the true colors. People can be deceiving with their ulterior motive being that of evil. Women are not victims as we are their mothers, sisters, daughters, lovers, wives, and friends. 

Keep alert

Not at all times would a man with bad intention show his hand right away. Most of the times, it comes in the guise of help. The target would be what your weakest spot is such as:

- the need for money

- the desire for a partner

- the wanting to be accepted

- not wanting him to be mad at you

- the need for help 

And, many more. As a woman, we are sometimes helpless. Yet, inside, we must gather the strength to stand up when wronged and discard the bait. You'll see the bait being dangled in front of you. "I have, I can, I will, if I want to." This is what some men who victimize women show and over-all, the 'if I want to' part is the controlling nature. 

"If I want to" 

Well, not at all times can us women get what we need and want from a man. Take note, there are some who do try yet can't really deliver. You'll have to weed out the real, the sincere, and the fake. See the motive and remember that you wear a skirt. Being pretty and attractive is an advantage yet it is also a weakness when we do not feel appreciated. Place aside the feelings for a while, do not base it on the "If I want to" of a man but instead be confident. Take a step back and objectively look at what your need and desire is then turn the table and think for your sake, the question is not if he wants but if you want to continue or stop. 

Too much hard sell

Like a used car salesperson, sometime there is too much talk for a man, too mush explanation, too much justification. then listen and think. Words sometimes spill out and then you'll see that there is not much room for doubt. Listen skills is something all people should develop then next would be studying the body language - then checking for mixed signals. 

Anger and control

It happens all the time in most relationships. The anger can be shown by saying it, by deprivation, by being ignored. Difficult as it seems, don't fall for it especially if you have not made any major mistakes. After all, we are but human and if unforgiveness is the way of life, say, "I can't go for that, no can do." 

Speak up 

Say what you want but please make sure that's what you want before stating it. It takes time to know what you want, not in a flash of desire, not in a moment, it must be a studied decision, like making a pros and cons chart. What is indeed what you want and what are the benefits that you are providing? Not just "friends with benefits" as it should ideally be a sincere relationship. Check your motives also. It is just for the help, the lack, the need? Then maybe it's just right when a man would say, "I can't go for that, no can do." depending on the situation and the intention. 

Rejection is part of life

We all get rejected. Take it in stride. Whatever doesn't kill you make you stronger, right? Sing that when you feel like crying. Cry when you feel like crying. Then wake up to the dawn of a new day and face the challenges head on because there are somethings that are so worth it and throwing in the towel is not an option. Yet, it is also possible that upon analyzing the situation, that you should thrown in the towel and say, "I can't go for that, no can do."

There are men that prey on women. There are men who respect and protect. There are men that stand by and do noting. As a woman, be like a man when in battle to defend and protect what you love. Keep a hold of your beauty when down. Treat people with tenderness so it shows. And when the abuse is starting, do not allow it to continue.

Listen and say it. "I can't go for that, no can do." Empower yourself.