The Pendulum Swings

Been focusing my energy on the balancing of the chakras and realizing that it has been unfair. There are other ways to go about finding the balance and in forgetting what the true nature is, how that point may be achieved, the way of surging forward was done in a manner that was wrong for it is not in others that we may find the balance, it is within ourselves.

Thus, I have snapped out of this, returning to the basics of how the color pendulum swings and noting that it is more that what traps us in the world. For to live in a mountaintop like that of a monk, there is peace without the trappings of society, without having to deal with others, without expectations, and sadly, apologetic, it has been wrong to seek fulfillment outside, from others, when ideally, I should have known as my third eye is open. For too long, I have forgotten, how to focus on the light, how to make it envelope my mind and how to swing a pendulum to balance the chakras. Getting irritated by minor things from the same source that pounds me with the major problems that there is no solution as it is the heart of discontent has been happening far too long to disrupt matters and though I may point the blame, it is the my reaction that stops the swing of the pendulum, among other things. 

Chasing the wind as the concept of time held me down, a void has been opened, seeking love only to be met with passion and desires. That void cannot be filled by anything as there is nothing to fill as it does not exist, as it exists only a soul that has been held onto this earth that must break away from the grounded nature. 

A rainy walk and long talks strikes a chord of harmony and learning - that there was something that I have been procrastinating about and to thinking about it, there is no excuse for why I am doing so as that is the solution, plus after dwelling on other topics - I do have an apology to give: 

You have been wonderful and there is more to you than meets the eye. In the depth of your spirit, the understanding and the saving made it possible for strength to return, to remove the pain. Thus, I acknowledge that because of your goodness, there has been a positive change to my life. Thoughts should have remained unspoken yet it is too late for that and I appreciate your understanding and this apology must be said as it was not your need that was thought of, in my failing, the thoughts were for myself, what I believed that was lacking and it is unfair to have burdened you. I was wrong and though there is no justifying feelings, it is just feelings that are out of focus. I am sorry and I am asking for forgiveness. It is not enough to say that I am but human. The primary concern should have been you. Please accept this apology. 

As I take a few deep breaths to finish this post, with a heart full of gratefulness and gladness for the understanding and acceptance of the weakness of the spirit, the lack of balance, and how it is good to know that the trust is there, though a few tears fall, it not because of sadness but from the spirit leveling up to a point of knowing that the mindfulness of the truth - of the suffering and the cause, of the end of suffering because of what frees us - is within. 

A five minute video. Please don't swat the unicorn, just read the words.