Just viewing and observing is like being a CCTV such as a situation where there is a robbery and the CCTV can't do anything to provide better security. On the defense, offense, stalemate, or whatever, being part of the living and not a zombie from The Walking Dead, we choose how to go about our day and make things happen to make it different.
Last night I couldn't sleep like the other nights before that. I read, study, listen to music, after hanging out with some friends for great laughs. Having to go home for my pets early and seeing with pain the clothes depleted and the fixing that has to be done because another daughter has begun to fly out of the nest. No regrets for today, again, thank goodness, taking things in stride and making the best of the situation.
Spent a few minutes the past couple of days observing the man that I cut off. The bulging eyes, the turned back, after he spoke up explaining when there was no question asked, such a bad liar and what I hate most is those, to keep in mind that all should be written when dealing with those kinds of people that might drag me in to a void of desperation. I see him staying, immobilized, short stacking newspaper to give away - wondering what does he want to accomplish. I see him waiting for night and I see that he is wearing down. I wonder if he wonders how to get a hold of the financier for after all, that man I have cut off has to indeed struggle for a while as such a waste of time to provide me hope when all the while what was dangled was vaudeville act for him to get the investment he wanted. I could have danced but I did not upon advice and groan, yah right. Talk is cheap and nearly effortless yet I listen to sound advice to return home where time can stand still, thinking of the next move or if I should move at all. Effortless squat, the petty cash amounts, so instead I write as I really can't figure out why a group of honest people would allow such a goon to be among them, acting like an entertainer with his loud voice dominating the conversation which is basically full of pride and his opinion - well, it is none of my business and I try to avoid being near such a person as I might get affiliated, argh!
That part of this post was written a while back. To continue.. I should place dates indeed.
June 17. Another normal and quiet day with the additional coolness of rain. Returning home from having the stitches in my eyelid removed as my brother who is a doctor took out a cyst last week, I felt sleepy and toxic. I had hurt my hand with a small knife cut as I was preparing lunch and had to force the small wound to bleed. Detoxing now with a cup of tea with honey, feeling sleepy, with not much of an appetite though I must eat as all I ate was lunch. Remembering how the cyst removal went, the delicate operation that my brother did, as there was a lighted long instrument anchoring my eyelid or so I think, as I yelped in the last few minutes, "There's something in my eye!" And he said, "Don't touch the instrument" as my hand was moving up. Nearly painless, only the sting of the needle was felt and the long sting of the thread removal today. I lie down now to rest, as this is the first real operation I have had in my life and I am glad the cyst is gone as there was the beginning of an infection already. The only other time I got operated on was for my eye bags to be removed with a slit incision at the bottom near the outer side of my eyes and the fat was pulled out. Right now I don't have eye bags and it has been many years, though I do have dark eye circles coz of lack of sleep.
A quiet night. Dogs are asleep. My head propped up on the pillows as I blog using a cellphone. Earlier today as I was at the side walk of a busy street, the sun was making me feel like I was going to sweat which I seldom do. The smell of the stench of the city, the fumes, the trash, the canal, made me hate the fact that people have to work and live in such areas, and then my mind drifts to more pleasant thoughts. Hmm..
Radical week. After the 2 benefit gigs I attended on Saturday and last night, the rock music has revived me as the entertainment was there. Evolution. Feeling like a Pokemon though I like Togepi. Are there only 3 stages and what kind of Pokemon am I? Maybe a fire Pokemon, if ever I get identified. Surrendering to the flow of the universe, as we say, "Don't let the pain control you." which is what Tupeng, a tattoo artist, was saying as he beat the drum, repeatedly, before at B-Side.
The benefit gigs show that though there are people with tats, it's not the pain, it's the no issue lifestyle, and that it is a world of acceptance and sharing, for who you are and the good that you can do. It's an awesome experience to be among these rockers and I appreciate the kind attention given plus the free beers too. The first pic which is rather unclear, is that of Ian Tayao and Louis Isok of Wilabaliw which was the benefit gig event at Checkpoint, Metro Star Mall, BF Homes Paranaque last Saturday. If you missed this gig, you missed a lot as aside from over 10 bands playing that night, Ian did his backflip and that signature side to side hip and knee dance, and as Isok wired the crowd, Ian started his haunting belt with a new move as his hands spread out like an eagle! The other gig was at Apache, which is where Swivel will open soon - wait for that chill place, and yes, only cool people are allowed! The second pic was the jam with the lead singer of Manila Under Fire and Anton Silos on the bass guitar. They played a number of songs and a couple of reggae tunes. It was great.
Checkpoint
Apache
Let the music play. Sometimes I feel like I can see right through people and know that some can see right through me. Let it be. Go drift with the waves, fall into the tide with the ebb, go for the life force and be alive. Since this is a totally random post which could be my signature move - there is nothing else to compare with being alive as we are players in life.
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